God of all the seasons

Hands in the air, tears streaming down my face. For once, I didn’t care what I looked like. I only cared that with every fiber of my being, I knew. 

Our God is an awesome God. 

I knew who I was and Whose I was. And what I was doing here. 

He reigns from heaven above.

I knew that I was His and He was in control. No matter what my feelings said. No matter what the world tried to tell me. 

With wisdom, power, and love.

There was a plan, and I was a part of it. There was a future, and hope and joy and love. Such love!

Our God is an awesome God.

Those of us who grew up in the Christian culture of the late 80s/early 90s can quote this song to you. We can tell you where we were when we first heard it. About how some people loved that Rich Mullins used the term awesome to describe God, as God is, indeed, inspiring awe or fear and extremely impressive, excellent, and wonderful. Whereas others felt it wasn’t quite right to use such an informal, surfer dude word to describe the Almighty God.

And me? I may have gone on this particular youth retreat, lured by the promise of meeting new friends and eating junk food and enjoying lots of laughter. But what I remember most is what it felt like to be in that huge crowd of teens and chaperones, singing Awesome God at the top of our lungs. 

It was as if time itself stopped to allow that moment of clarity. This was what we were made to do:  to worship the God Who made us and loved us and understood the dramas and joys of every season we would ever muddle through. This was our reason for existing. 

Fast forward 30 years, and I’m carrying a bit more baggage. My steps aren’t nearly as spry as they were back then. My heart is quite a bit heavier. I walk into church with my husband and adult daughter. The band begins to play the familiar refrain, with a few modern tweaks. But the message is the same. 

Our God is an awesome God.

I’m no longer the happy-go-lucky teenager I was when I first sang this tune, but I’m still singing. These days, I must look for hope rather than simply having it stretch out in front of me like a yellow brick road with a neon sign proclaiming DREAM BIG! THE FUTURE IS BRIGHT. These days, I must fight for joy. And fight, I will.

He reigns from heaven above. 

Not everything in my life has gone according to plan. Not my plan, at least. This has disappointed me at times, but it hasn’t surprised God. When I look out at all the horrible things happening in our world, I sigh. Yet I still believe that He is working out all things for our good and His glory because He reigns.

With wisdom, power, and love.

He’s still in the business of doing what He knows is best, ruling with a wisdom I can only fathom. My job is to keep worshipping, to keep trusting. Not to give in to that increasing pull of cynicism, that constant stream of overwhelm. The looking back longingly and looking forward fearfully.

Our God is an awesome God.

Aging can be brutal. Time marches on, regardless of how we feel about it. No one asks our permission. I met a woman at the gym the other day who is fresh into her retirement. She told me, “The day comes when you can just do whatever you want with your time. You’ve raised your kids, finished your career, and now it’s time for you. The only problem is that now you’re old.” Even though she is entering a different season than I, I can relate. Once we get used to one season, another one is upon us! And we get to learn how to navigate this new place.

My God, You’re an awesome God.

No matter what has changed in my world over the past 30 years, God is still the same. Imagine that! Still the same. I met my college roommate for coffee back in the spring. She was in town for the evening, and we hadn’t seen each other since her second child’s baby shower. (Her second child is now a teenager!) We cried with joy when we saw each other and were delighted to find that we can still talk as easily (and for as long) as we could those many years ago in our cozy little dorm room. We took a selfie before we had to part, and I dug up a similar picture of us back in our college days and texted her the then-and-now shots. “I think we’re cuter now!” She said. And we’re going to go with that . . . .

You’re great in all you do.

He still is. And that makes a difference in my sorrows, in my joys, in all my days. Even when my day, my week, my month, my current season isn’t great, God is! We can trust in His goodness because that’s Who He is.

I’m made to worship you.

Once again, my arms are raised. My heart is filled with certainty. Even when I can’t see it, He is working. For He is loving and faithful to all He has made. He was then. He is now.

My God, You’re an awesome God.

What was once my purpose is my purpose still. It may look a bit different now, as do I. But it will always be my purpose. Young or old. In joy or sorrow. Valley or mountaintop. I am His. What fueled me then can still fuel me now. 

We don’t have to take Rich Mullins’s words for it. Psalm 65 tells us:  You answer us with awesome and righteous deeds, God our Savior, the hope of all the ends of the earth and of the farthest seas, who formed the mountains by your power, having armed yourself with strength, who stilled the roaring of the seas, the roaring of their waves, and the turmoil of the nations (vs. 5-7).

And I especially love verse 8:  The whole earth is filled with awe at your wonders; where morning dawns, where evening fades, you call forth songs of joy. If you’ll permit me some personal license here, I believe we can even look at morning as our younger years and evening as our, shall we say, more mature years. And in doing so, we find that in all the seasons of our lives, God calls forth songs of joy. Joy is possible! It is! And it’s all because of our Awesome God.